Dracula: A Love Tale review

everybody involved with this should be ashamed . luc besson basically just remade coppolas dracula(music and all ) and for what ? they even stole the name elizabeta(not his real wifes name ). im confused why you would remake a classic with less talented and less attractive actors .

it's damn near a shot by shot remake. who asked for this ? my head is now hurting. the white lead actress has big fake lips because of course she does. plus the other actress with the modern american valley girl accent in 1880s europe.

dracula is walking around in the daytime but the other vampire fried when they put her in the sunlight :-/. this movie is very french(thats not a compliment ). it's ridiculous but not smart enough to be camp.

now the vampire that fried when they put her in the sunlight can stand in the sunlight  :-/. 

The Paper 2025 tv show review

Domhnall Gleeson is the most irish looking irish guy, with a bad american accent, is pissing me off. the fact that they brought back oscar who did absolutely nothing in the office & not stanley who begged to come back is making me feel some sort of way(i guess they figured 3 black actors were way too much).i had no interest in watching "The Paper" but im slightly sick & need to waste some time while my cakes cool down(is that a metaphor? who knows).

the american office was not a great show & it was only better than the original uk version because of Steve Carell & Rainn Wilson (argue with ya mama). i dont have high hopes for this though i do love Sabrina Impacciatore & she really is the only reason why i am still watching. im laughing once per episode.

the catfish episode pissed me off but the ending was spectacular. they need to stop fucking with my girl esmeralda.

they already decided to give it a second season before the 1st was even on tv but its really not worth watching

Americathon 1998 1979

 

i love wacky futuristic movies like this from the 1970s.i ended up falling asleep from not being sober the 1st time i watched last night but this is a REALLY good movie even though this wont be a good review(i went back to the dr today & still drugged up from that but i had to share this lol).

americathon starts off with everybody living in cars, not driving them because gas/housing is too expensive (sounds like real life in 4 months). the president is a moron( sound familiar?) and everybody is broke. one scene talks of a new reality show were males with small penii are made fun of. or the other tv show where the child & dad crossdress together. its sad that what they thought was unbelievable is our actual reality. 

the tuxedo tracksuit is taking me out. Zane Buzby is the baddest of bitches & shouldve gotten an oscar for this.

they sold san diego to the mexicans. no comment on that. 

twilight saga films review 2008 2009 2010 2012

 twilight 2008

ive been putting this off for a while now.i hate kristen stewart but i love robert pattinson. the only way i can watch this is not sober so thats what i am. jacobs wiglet makes me stabby. all the "teen" vampires look 35. i wasnt expecting the dialog to be good but this is so cringe. its like they cast the oldest, ugliest, non acting-est white "actors" they could find. all the vampires in the geisha makeup is making me feel some sort of way.

this fan scene is a mess. i can see why rpattz refuses to talk about these movies. im confused why everybody is dressed like its 1995? none of this is cute & the wigs are so cheap. i knew it was going to be stupid but this is insane! did people actually take this seriously when it came out? everything is so aggressively mediocre(im sure thats why it was so popular with whites).

it irks me when vampires can be out in the sunlight.

i love the fact that i had no idea they made this many twilight movies. its just not believable that a vampire(,wolf, any kind of monster, etc) would hide out in a small town or choose to pretend to be a high school student. an adult would have more freedom & less people would notice they werent growing up. not all the vampires wanting to eat bella out. this movie is gross on so many different levels. it ended like they just ran out of film.

Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009)

the vampire geisha makeup is a little better but still tragic. jacob still walking around with a $20 synthetic wiglet plopped on his head. its pissing me off that the vampires are corny/creepy but not sexy. 

i get that this is for tweens/teens but its so aggressively stupid. kstew cant act. like at all. so edward loves bella so much he leaves her alone in the woods in a town she just moved to? cool cool.

i just frowned the entire movie

Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010)

 i just dont understand how these movies were popular. kstew still cant act. 

Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 1

if my life depended on it,i could not tell you what the plots of these movies are. its like they are so boring i forget what i saw as soon as its over.

im getting pretty tired of the "i only kill evil men" trope.

did this fool make a sex joke at the wedding or??????? so anna kendricks character is a hater but bella stays inviting her? i cant stand a passive aggressive betch. everybody should be thankful im not in charge cause none of those heaux wouldve gotten an invite.

all this focus on bellas vagina is making me queasy. so he banged her so hard he broke all the furniture in the room(but not her vagina?)????????

k

cool cool

taylor lautner is fine af.

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2

now had i known my future gay husband lee pace was in this i wouldve watched it years ago.

kstew is just so aggressively bland. i am crying,this is so stupid. now i have to name my child nessie.

i cant pretend to care about any of this.i was already pissed when i started to watch this & the end is absolutely about to piss me off.

michael sheens wiglet is about to fly off but im loving how much cvnt he has been serving. its like he's in a whole different(better) movie. jamie campbell bower shouldve been the next big thing. im confused why the ending credits has to be an hour long. most of these actors were seen longer in the credits than the actual movie

Eden 2025 ron howard movie review

 ive been waiting a while for this to come out. its a very weird true story but i dont believe that ron howard will tell it. it shows exactly how destructive & evil whites can be when they think they wont get caught but i dont think he will go there. im sure he will blame it on the women instead of getting to what the real problem was and is.

ok,lets go!

sydney sweeney is so unfortunate looking & her not wearing makeup isnt really helping. im going to assume shes trying to do a german accent? idk. they shouldve just cast a german woman cause this aint it. also if all 5 are german why is only sydney the one with the struggle "german" accent?

i really cant imagine how shitty it would be if you moved to an empty island then 50/11 random whites started showing up.

i feel like i should be happier seeing jude law go full frontal but this movie is pissing me off. plus where tf did jude get such a nice ass from? when did this happen???? i cant even enjoy jude being double cheeked up because this movie is so bad. i refuse to google what accent ana de armas is trying to do. i will just assume because she is a fake aristocrat that it is a fake accent cause......

the "beautiful" "baroness"

& of course, now the part where he blames all of this on women start. i get that most of this is just fiction to create drama but how big of an idiot do you have to be to steal when you know there are only 2 other people(that they know would not steal from them)? i HATE historical fiction so this is my fault for watching this. i hoped that ron howard would tell the actual story not just the normal "women are bad and men are the best" propaganda.

this fool is using a filthy spoon to dig out her placenta. it is never that serious. at that point, just let me die because i am too big of an idiot to live anymore.

the problem with this is that whites arent going to see it as a cautionary tale. they will watch this stupid movie then try to recreate it in a 3rd world country.

not the baroness saying the only cure she needs is some good dick(i feel her but still.....). its a 2 hour movie & its taken me over 4 hours to watch it(& its still not at the end).

finally finished it 7 hours later. was it worth it? of course not. vanessa kirby & ana was wasted.

Peterloo 2018

 

i find it fascinating how someone like me who is obsessed with english history just found out about the Peterloo massacre a couple of months ago(& had i not been obsessed with Rory Kinnear, would have never heard of it at all probably). the sets & costumes are pretty accurate. everybody is poor & looks like they smell.

all of these problems are sounding suspiciously modern. i can see why this is never talked about.

maxine peake is so slept on.ive never seen her give a bad performance.

seeing all the plebs in their best clothes so calm & full of hope before they were killed makes me feel some sort of way.

i really should not have watched this movie. if it did happen like this, everybody involved(the soldiers & the rich) should have been ashamed.

The Phoenician Scheme review

 

as usual, i have no idea what this movie, The Phoenician Scheme, is about.wes anderson hasnt made a good movie since Moonrise Kingdom so my hopes are not high for this. tptb keep trying to make Mia Threapleton a thing & i really wish they would stop. Kate Winslet was never a beauty & her daughter Mia has even less appeal. 

the only reason to watch this is bryan cranston & tom hanks. i fear their scenes are only 5 minutes total,though. why show them when we can have boring scenes & close ups of mias blank, bland cinderblock noggin?

the movie was just a whole lot of nothing. in 80 years it might be entertaining but for now,it is not. 

Queen of the Ring 2025

 i grew up watching wrestling. why my grandma loved it, i have no idea, but i was there with her watching all the matches. once i grew up, i was even asked to join a revival of the real glow show(i am not athletic & we'd REALLY be fighting if someone hit me in the face so i politely declined).

i know a little of the history but i know Queen of the Ring isnt going to tell the truth(about how Mildred Burke was abused then allegedly ended up doing the same to the younger female wrestlers who came after her). for that reason alone i didnt want to watch it but josh lucas is still such a hottie so.........

its pissing me off this is set in the 1940s but shes walking around in a 2024 padded underwire bra & a tank top.i know joshs salary isnt that big that they couldnt have gone on ebay to buy a 1940s bra. i just wish it wasnt so low budget,the ladies deserve a lot more than this.

so billy wolfe cheated on her,hit her,stole money from her, & she asked him to marry her? then she tries to pretend she is a mastermind & in charge? sounds just like a white woman.

francesca eastwood is so pretty & they give her absolutely nothing to do. hopefully she can get her personal life together & get better acting roles after this. these 1990s rainbow/forever 21 spandex outfits are making me stabby. not even walton goggins can get rid of my frown.

ok,now this is pissing me off. there is a very dramatic & badly acted scene where gladys gillem dies in the 1950s. beyonces internet tells me the real gladys died in 2009 so what is this shit? what was the point? i assume the love affair between mildred & billys son is also fake but this is all so unnecessary. 

A Cruel Love The Ruth Ellis Story review

 

when i was about 7, someone gave me a very graphic book about various historical crimes & ruth ellis was one of the stories in it. it absolutely wasnt an appropriate book to give to a child. basically they said she killed david blakely because she was a stupid slut with a gun. they didnt explain how her dad raped her & her sister or how her husband used to beat her or how david punched her in the stomach & how that lead to her losing their baby 2 weeks before she killed david blakely.

i was reading an article about this new show A Cruel Love : The Ruth Ellis Story &, of course, all the comments are from men glad she was hanged & basically calling her a stupid slut with a gun(it did include her miscarriage but in their minds she deserved that). 70 years later & men are still just as cruel. all the men in her life let her down over & over & to actually see it is triggering. her life meant nothing to them so his meant nothing to her.

i didnt want to watch it because i know what she went through way too well. the acting is good & the wardrobe is cute. i guess the worst part for me is how her son andre saw desmond cussen give her the gun, teach her how to shoot it, & once he was grown he ended up hating her just as much as the rest. andre ended up desecrating her grave before killing himself. he couldve taken that anger to help other women in her situation but instead acted like a typical male...........

Game of Thrones - Season 1 review

 so ive never seen game of thrones & i want to watch house of the dragon but i feel like i need to see thrones first so here we go.

not even 20 minutes in & so many sh!tty weaves. im so tired of hollywood refusing to hire black hairstylists(,makeup artists,actresses, directors, writers,etc). these $10 wigs are making me feel some sort of way.

not even through with the 1st episode & all this "sensuality" is grossing me out.i know it gets worse but geez. it tries so hard to be shocking but its only very,very gross. its obvious the only writers were white males.

not baby arya beating everybodys azz. she is already my favorite,everybody else is lame af.

ep6: this show is very stupid

a lot of these actors cant act.i keep falling asleep (which is rare)but i feel like it doesnt even matter. like im not missing anything. im confused why this was so popular.

eta after watching season 3: im guessing there are 50/11 characters so they can just get killed throughout the season. the stark mom getting killed really bummed me out,i liked her. the acting/writing is still very bad but at least they are buying $50 wigs instead of $10 ones

eta after finishing the entire show: i can see why people were pissed at the end. it was like it was written by somebody who had never seen the show. im actually really surprised nobody was smart enough to make thrones style clothes a trend. margaery tyrell & the khaleesi STAYED in a nice outfit. 

the acting & wigs improved a little but it was boring & not really worth watching.