facebook "friends"

ive been on facebook for at least a decade.today was the 2nd time ive read my facebook messages in that time. there were thousands of messages but the general gist i got is that white people need more hobbies. instead of sending racist emails to black people you dont know, why not read a book? or exercise? or paint your trailer? or raise your children? why not make that extra energy into doing something productive with your life?

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to all the hotties who slid in my dms, sorry. its not you, its me. i got some non sexual emails from steven adler asking me to go to his concert. i am so sorry(you have no idea how sorry i am that i missed that). young Dallas wouldve KILLED to hang out/make out with steven adler but its probably for the best we never met.i feel like we'd be way too similar to sid and nancy & this timeline is already fucked up enough already.
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to all the distant relatives who slid out of the woodwork after you saw me on tv ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. when i needed a family, y'all were too busy so lets keep that same energy.