"debby"

 

i went to a party & ran into my agent with his new client, an older white actress i will call debby. debby had been in most of my favorite childhood films & i was excited to meet her. i did nothing offensive & as soon as our agent walked away she decided to be as racist & as rude as possible.

a year goes by & i hear that debbys savings were stolen by scammers & she was almost homeless. the best part was that i knew those scammers. they were very hot gay men who stole from women/men who wanted to be their sugarmamas. debby had always been unattractive & usually played the ugly friend. she was at least old enough to be their grandma but in typical white woman fashion she thought these young gay males actually wanted her. if i had been her friend, i couldve warned her against hanging out with the scammers but she thought being racist was more important than making a new friend that day..........

Bumble Presents:The Stella Heartois Experience - V2

oy

i'm SLIGHTLY drunk so this might be painful to read

anyhoo

this was one of the worst parties i've been to for a while

invite says party starts at 7pm & to get there early.7:20 & we are still standing out front. "celebrities" are being let in while we stand there watching.i am literally the most famous person there, which is sad.

i read all the emails sent before because i'm a nerd.when i got there they were taking reservations for the dinner. cool. whatever. we give our names to the hostess around 7:30,the 1st seating is at 8:15(supposedly).we are standing by the hostess the entire time.they let in randoms,asking us to move over. 8:15 goes by, 8:35, 8:45, we are told the next seating will be in an hour unless we are investors or scheduled online(that is one of the MANY lies we were told by pr women/hostesses because there was no way to schedule that online but whatever).we are not investors so we wait standing in line.they continue to let in randoms around us(who i know & are definitely NOT investors).we still wait patiently.a security guard says we cant wait in line 2 minutes after the hostess says we need to wait in line because their list/wifi is down. he makes sure everybody moves out of the line. ok

eventually everybody pushes towards the dinner area. we are butts to nuts. i'm sweating & wearing chanel but its fine,i'm a survivor.i came there with a full stomach but its the principal at this point.i was told the year before meghan trainor had a concert but no such luck this year.just bs & lies for 2020.they hand out half cooked cold sliders(why are white people SO obsessed with raw meat?????).i ate it despite being disgusted,i hate to waste food.it was a valentines party but most of the hot guys were gay & with their boyfriends(i ended up dancing with most of them later at the gay bar on the other side of town).we finally push our way inside the dinner area when the hostesses are distracted(i have no idea what time but definitely later than the 9:30 we were promised multiple times). to be fair, the actual dinner food was one of the best meals ive ever had even though it was supposed to be shared(im guessing they ran out of food by that time. the "shared salad" was literally 3 pieces of lettuce & "shared ribs" were 2 small cubes of meat.i left before dessert so i have no idea how tiny that was).my alarm was set for 10:50pm which is when i left for the gay club(dont ask).

olivia culpo was supposed to be there.she is not important enough to be googling but im guessing she is the white woman who was there for 3 minutes & wore that white dress that BARELY covered her ass. if so, good job? she literally did nothing but im sure she was paid handsomely for the "effort". anyways, i need to sleep for frieze tomorrow.

the wake up call

today was a weird one.i go to an event & there is this black woman standing alone being ignored.i walk over & we start to talk.she says she is trying very hard to fit in so that the white people will know she belongs.she seems embarrassed to be seen with me.i tell her it doesnt matter what she does, it is like that "what do you call a black doctor" joke & they will always see her as a n!gger. mlk didnt change that, obama didnt change that, & saint beyonce didnt change that.

she says racism only affects black people who act like stereotypes(let that sink in) & somehow her $10 dress, kim kardashian valley girl accent, & knock off shoes were going to prevent it.when i was younger i was just as ignorant.

she said that it was my negative attitude that made people call me a n!gger.i didnt tell her my stories because she wouldnt understand.

the time when i called about a job in hollywood & was told he didnt hire n!ggers
or the time when the woman said she didnt rent to "you people"
or the time a security guard assaulted me,called me a n!gger, & kept his job
or the time when i was told my natural hair was gross so i didnt get the acting job
or the time when i was just standing on the corner & some man yelled out n!gger to me
or the teenager who yells n!gger into my window every time she passes
or the time when the police handcuffed me & knocked me down because i was walking in a non black neighborhood in the afternoon

she kept going on & on about how my negative attitude was the reason why racist things happened to me & how i needed to change my mind.i said others needed to stop being racist & i know my worth so there was nothing that needed to be changed.

like i said,i used to be that ignorant.i assumed since i was hard working, beautiful, & smart that people would see me as an individual.i love heavy metal,speak japanese badly, hang out with the aristocracy, have a good job, & no "baby daddies".i hate watermelon, am an atheist, have traveled all around the world, ALWAYS has a book in my purse,bought a guitar, & play the flute. i didnt fall into the usual traps,didnt let god or men distract me. but like my neighbor(the 5'3 mexican man covered in prison tattoos with 5 kids all living in a 1 bedroom apartment) said, i am the stereotype.all people will ever see is black skin & never just Dallas the person.no amount of me pretending everything is ok is going to change that.

she asked me why i looked so sad.i was sad because she really believed that her light skin & "good hair" was going to shield her from white supremacy.i was sad because she probably had a white mom who lied & said she was better than normal black people.i was sad because she would waste most of her life trying to be a model minority for people who hated her.they wouldnt see that light skin or "good hair", they'd just see a n!gger. just like moi

the n!gger wake up call can be harsh & i'm glad i got mine while alone.i hope hers is the same.

CB2 Afterhours LA with Mark Ronson

so i've had a crush on Mark Ronson since forever. his sister samantha gave me the googly eyes a couple of times but unfortunately I am VERY straight. i went to the party and my only goal was to make out with Mark Ronson. he was awkward but his thighs were calling me(still regret not seeing his bottom but i'm sure i can imagine what an english white guys azz looks like). someone said that he was married and that made me frown.

about 12 people came up and said i looked amazing but the D owns a mirror so I wasn't surprised. mark never said it so I frowned some more.i have another sexy european millionaire on deck so don't cry for moi just yet. i ended up taking some OOTD pix but since this blog doesn't pay the bills they can wait{kanye shrug}.

yesterday I was thinking "why haven't i seen simon rex lately?" and lo and behold he came up to my future husband mark to say hello. simon is another old crush despite the pron and terrible blonde hair dye.

mark played a lot of rap/classic r and b but the place was 99% white and it always disturbs me to see white people dancing to rap.i'm pretty open minded but white people getting "crunk" always gets a no from me.i was wasted and it was time to go home

Lucky Brand Spring 2017 Cocktail Party

so the Lucky Brand  clothes were ok(everything was just SO 1994)but i really liked the embroidered hippie denim and fake vintage KISS band and Jack Daniel's t-shirts. too bad they were only giving away embroidered bandanas and kept running out of thread? i stood in line and got nothing. Kate Bosworth breezed past the hoi polloi(to talk business?) with some men in suits. she's very pretty but is only getting modeling jobs because she is white. the girl is 5'3 at best.

98% sure i was talking to McLovin but he had a fake german accent. whatever. his body looked INCREDIBLE and had he not brought a horse faced blonde we would have probably made out. oh well, Christopher Mintz-Plasse knows where to find me now.

about 6 people came up and said i was best dressed at the party but we already knew that.a band started playing(i refuse to even use google to figure out their name).the sound was bland maroon 5 pop and the cute lead singer kept singing to me.one of the guys in the audience said he had a crush and it was very embarrassing(for a person who never gets embarrassed). I  had 5 jack daniels cocktails plus 1 glass of wine and was still not drunk so I knew it was time to go home

Rocket From The Crypt LIVE At The Dr. Martens Store

i haven't listened to Rocket From The Crypt since high school but I was super excited when I saw the invitation.i left the house 3 hours early and got there 1 hour late. the Dr. Martens store was packed with middle aged long haired white men in faded black band t-shirts.on the sidewalk were 40 other men with 2 white women.no one was being let inside.i didn't go there to dehydrate outside so I went to the grocery store. badly planned parties personally offend me. why invite 200 people if your store can only hold 50?

nick cannon grown and sexy halloween masquerade ball

now I knew Nick Cannon would be filming this party for VH1 (it will air on halloween).i had been paid many years ago to attend one of his other events and decided to go to this one(for free) even though I think he is cute but corny.  i've been to plenty of reality tv parties, i show up and everyone is on break because the camera wasn't rolling.this is not a good sign. the "partygoers" are outside sitting on the sidewalk smoking in formalwear and nick is at the dj booth not playing music.ok.

one of the white female crew members grabs me and starts yelling orders. i guess she thought I was an extra so I ignored that. she should be thankful i am trying to be nonviolent. i see empty bottles stacked up but no one has a drink. i ask her where the real bar is and she is offended.

"we are shooting a tv show ,there is no alcohol on set!"

lol, really? i've been on plenty of sets(reality and "real" productions) where alcohol and illegal substances were handed out by the crew so I knew she was a moron and I needed to go. i was there less than 3 minutes though that is not a record for me

donkey of the day: me

i'm at this boring party filled with black rappers and white women with horrible plastic surgery.i find a comfortable place to sit in the mansion and take it all in.

there is this cute guy with TERRIBLE hair that looks vaguely familiar.he gives me the eye. i assume he is a rapper as well,maybe that rae guy? so now i'm reading that article about lena dunham & find out the cutie with bad hair was Odell Beckham jr. i can be such a spaz at times

Pandora Summer Crush featuring fergie + 5 seconds of summer

i rsvped 2 hours before the show to see the other black eyed peas and ended up getting a vip pass that I didn't even use. for fergie , they asked us to show up 8 hours in advance to pick up our pass. i'm early and there is easily 300 sweaty teenagers waiting in line.i nope the fuck out of there and get a cheeseburger instead . i like fergie but not enough to wait in line for hours with annoying teens.

i'm invited to 4 parties but i'm exhausted from no disco nap and only go to one at an art gallery. my personal jesus, miss pamela des barres is the hostess.all the men were 50+ and wearing inappropriate "sexy" outfits like skintight leather pants with a vest and no shirt.i have no problem with old men (john slattery can get it any day he wants ) or sexy seniors(helen mirren is still sexier than most women half her age)but seeing that just creeped me out.i left early to eat candy and harass my ex.

Nordstrom Pop-In Launch Event featuring ty dolla sign

i'm hungover already so i'll keep it short.the event was held in a sketchy part of town(at night ) and all the emails asked the partiers not to bring pepper spray or weapons.we were early and got a spot across from the entrance but I know others weren't so lucky.i  repeated my name 5 times to the woman at the door and she was acting like she would not let me in until a male friend vouched for me. my name was on the list but his was not .

the food truck had free but inedible food ,the taco stand was just as bad.i took 1 bite and threw up .it was time to get wasted.they said they had "totally exclusive sneakers designed by Olivia Kim" but all i saw was 2 pairs of shoes on the cotton candy table.there was a claw machine filled with free vans swag but it broke every time I stood in line to use it .a worker said it would be at the mall and I could try again but why would i go through all that when they should have just given out gift bags? i saw exactly 1 person who got something from the claw machine .a worker eventually gave me a coupon for a free towel but it wasn't as good as the prizes in the machine (also, i've never used a coupon in my life and doubt if I will be starting now).

at that point ty dolla sign started to play but I had no idea. when I did ,it was too crowded to see .the only thing that didn't make me gag was the champagne ,so i overdid it a bit .when the event was over the security guards were VERY loud and rude telling the people to get out .we had bottles of water given to us by the bartender but were told we could not take them out.i found that to be pretty irresponsible .i made a couple of new friends but the event was pretty bad.i expected much more from Nordstrom

that one time taboo from the black eyed peas tried to "put me in my place "

so tonight was a secret black eyed peas show.i assumed fergie would be there but she wasn't(yes i know they only added her to get famous
) . bep isn't my scene but I figured why not, they have a couple of good songs. i'm standing in the front row watching will i am. taboo grabs my arm and turns me around so that I look at him(unfortunately this isn't the first time that has happened at a concert ). i HATE strangers touching me and do a fake smile so he will go away.i wonder if it's rude if I just leave but the crowd was packed and I was enjoying myself despite fergie not being there .

will i am says brown lives matter , then all lives matter and my crush on him disappears . taboo decides he wants to talk so I continue to be friendly despite feeling uncomfortable with his attention and he figures he needs to "put me in my place ". i'm not going to repeat what happened but it was uncalled for. what was my crime ? not giving him attention ? being dressed modestly ? or my biggest sin, being a black woman in public ?

it caught me off guard because bullying like that usually comes from black male celebrities .i guess hes hung out so long with will i am that he thinks he is an honorary negro. i'm minding my own ,not saying a word and it makes them incensed ! it's never one on one and they always need a crowd to back them up .i'm not even going to say what happened those other times either but it was pretty bad and not something a normal person could easily get over .

afterwards my "friends" ran up to tell me how hilarious him bullying me was and it reminded me how black women aren't supposed to have feelings .at no point did anyone defend me or ask if I were ok. like everyone else I was there to have a good time but instead i was humiliated and disrespected for no reason . again ,i should be used to it by now but I am not. sad part is, i'm sure he made even more fans by doing that .

tyga and kylie jenners party

just got back from the mansion . i will do a real post if my photographer emails me(or not).go to bed :-)

the charity case

we sneak into this charity auction in beverly hills while i'm wearing a 1960s dress that i bought for a dollar.the place is packed with famous actors & millionaires.i get some free champagne & am front row when the bidding starts.

the charity is for sick children & no one is bidding. i am getting really upset & my friend has to shush me because i almost go off on everyone invited.pretty sure the charity made negative amounts of money that night (nothing was bid on while i was there). i could shame them by typing their names (these are all actors who've been working at least since the 1990s so they were not broke) but i won't.

boohoo popup store party

so i went to the boohoo party tonight. mischa barton was there looking cute in white lace(& it seemed like i was the only one to tell her so). is her episodes of "dancing with the stars" on yet? idk. i havent watched tv in MANY years. samantha ronson in a hillary clinton t-shirt was the dj. people told me there were a lot of youtube stars & friends of kylie jenner but again idk. i rsvped  & got a confirmation from boohoo saying that my name was on the list yet it wasnt. i find that VERY annoying. the party was lame until i found a new friend. the drinks were strong but there was only 1 attractive man(& he was a waiter). after getting wasted, i left early to hang out at chik-fil-a bc why not? lol

super pissed that i missed guns n roses tonight. passed by the troubadour where they are playing twice :-(. i also refuse to go to coachella to see them so i guess me marrying axl rose will never be,lol. 8 year old dallas would be SO angry right now. of course i would be out & about/oblivious when they were handing out tickets. i met axl,we have mutual friends, yet i still cant make it happen....

jeremy scott x melissa shoes party

so i've been sick for a while(still a bit feverish but went out anyway).i've seen jeremy scott at a couple of hllywd parties so i just assumed that he would be at his.i was wrong. the 1st person to greet me was rumer willis. she's had her jaw shaved down so she looks less "taterish" but now has the 1990s demi moore pixie haircut (unfortunately) which shows off how prettier her mother was/is.i try not to talk ish about rumer anymore(she really cant help the tater face) but for whatever reason she rubs me the wrong way. maybe in my old age i'll get over it....or not.

so jeremy was not at his party but the shoes were adorable. i drank my champagne quickly & got out of there asap. the whole thing just seemed so low budget & depressing.even the salespeople(who i'm guessing work on commission) were complaining to me about how lame the party was & how they couldnt wait to go home :-(

its la fashion week & i rsvpeed for 20 fashion shows but i doubt that i will be going to any of them. lafw is SO super lame these days.no real designers even show, just rappers with t-shirt lines & bored housewives of millionaires who think they are the next coco chanel. its pathetic

saint laurent at the palladium

unfortunately i was running cpt & missed the actual YSL fashion show,though i did get to witness the afterparty/bands.first up was beck who did an amazing job playing other peoples songs(no shade). then was my idol miss joan jett.

now i could go on & on talking about how joan has influenced me since i was a child & saw Light of Day over & over on hbo. i'll keep it short because i am wasted & need to wake up early for another party tomorrow :-).i will say that she is a living legend & i am glad to finally see her live. i ran into SO many celebrities like grace coddington , giovanni ribisi, Hamish Bowles, sexy josh homme (& brody dalle?), Tyler The Creator , matt sorum , etc(again super wasted & i need to sleep). an amazing night & i was told iggy pop was backstage & would be the last to play. unfortuntely it was WAY past my bedtime.

fatty boom boom

so i'm hanging out in the playboy mansion minding my own business. a chubby white man & woman are frantically whispering beside me. "should I ask her?""idk""maybe" blahblahblah. now i'm annoyed. they are drunk & i know something racist is about to happen so I ask "what would you like to know?"

the woman asks "do you think he is attractive?" he is tall, claims to be a football player, preppy looking, brown hair, like a fat, young tom cruise. i honestly say that he has a cute face but isn't my type, that I prefer skinny antichrist superstar era Marilyn manson looking guys. now he's offended. his face turns red, how dare this negress NOT want him! he's yelling all sorts of racist nonsense & i'm cool, not bothered, unaffected. the woman apologizes, i say i'm not angry. that makes him madder. i tell him that most women prefer a man who is not fat, wish him well, & move to another part of the mansion.

jagermeister

went to a jagermeister party at no vacancy. i LOVE the houston brothers & highly recommend all of their clubs.no vacancy is set in a 1920s br0thel & the scenery is very Victorian wh0rehouse(which is, of course, how I will decorate my future house).big shout out to tony the bouncer!

you'd think since it was thrown by jagermeister the drinks would be the best part but they weren't. i'm a lightweight & I had 3 cocktails with barely a buzz. i was one of the 1st people in line & it took 30 minutes to get those watered down drinks :-(. the food was all cold & they ran out of meat in the first couple of minutes. all the men were unattractive & annoying. i ended up wearing my pajamas but I really should have stayed at home...

pia mia

i'm drunk, got a contact high, & I just want to watch "archer" while eating my subway sammich, so i'll make this brief. got invited to a party by kode magazine with a "performance" by pia mia. I've never heard pia,have no idea if she is on the radio, i came in with an open mind.

I was 2 hours late to the party, i show up & everybody is squeezed into a back room sweating. not a good sign. there are port o potties(what?) in the back & a security guard blocking the real restrooms. i see her standing on the side of the stage for 20 minutes,the man introducing her has no idea how a mic works & is pointing it everywhere but his mouth. you can hear every other word. I am not impressed. she is wearing the tackiest 1980s aerobic leopard outfit & her backup dancers are in goodwill couture. she says some nonsense about how "don't you know who I am?" & does not need to say her name. i am frowning now. the songs are ok,catchy, but she's in spandex lingerie & "twerking". I say "twerking" like I say "performance" because it's all half @ssed, unprofessional, & reminds me of high school talent shows. i guess they are trying to make her into the new Britney spears because she is white but these days you need more. just being white is NOT good enough. the whole thing was so lame & basic that I felt embarrassed for her(& y'know the D does not get embarrassed).

her lingerie was like something Ke$ha would have worn 3 years ago & then she decided to take it off on stage :-(. again with the "twerking" & her backup dancers doing "sexy" moves & now i'm pissed. here's the deal, women are more than just objects to be fapped to. pia sold herself short & instead of being interesting(or talented) she decided to take off her panties & show her @ss to an audience who talked loudly throughout her set & had their backs to the stage. afterwards, she saw me, her eyes got huge, she gasped, & turned around to go the other way. I don't know who is her manager/stylist but they ALL need to be fired. girl, do better. seriously. the whole thing was so fetch that I cant even.

the end.
lolz

steve aoki's pizza party

yesterday I got an invite to the steve aoki pizza party for today. it will be held on 4 acres of a Beverly hills mansion & the price is only $1,000 to attend(they were also gracious enough to send a 50% off coupon). LOL. super tacky. pretty sure steve(& his dad) are millionaires who can afford to throw a party for free.

I see its also a new trend for promoters to send the invites only the day before which I find idiotic. you've been planning the party for a while yet you send the invites at the last moment? even if I do have time, i never go to parties like that. its just rude.